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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29643519">Wake Me When It's Over</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/deepestfathoms/pseuds/deepestfathoms'>deepestfathoms</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Prom (2020), The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Public Humiliation, Teenage Drama, kids are assholes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 20:35:15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,982</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29643519</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/deepestfathoms/pseuds/deepestfathoms</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Public bathrooms were a rational fear.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Wake Me When It's Over</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Winnie got anxiety over many different things: crossing the street, asking for things, not meeting deadlines, public speaking, carrying a project into school, tripping on staircases, forgetting lines in Theater, driving… But one thing she would never, ever be ashamed of was public bathrooms.</p><p>There were just so many things that could go wrong! And she could be recognized so easily! Redheads were basically endangered in Indiana- she was pretty sure she was the only one in the entire school! </p><p>She specifically remembered this time freshman year- she had gone to the bathroom to specifically blow her nose because that was another thing that gave her painful anxiety. She would rather not breathe than blow her nose around other people, but in this case, she literally couldn’t breathe because she had what had to be the WORST cold in the history of colds. Her nostrils were completely stuffed with mucus, and the back of her throat was already slimy with fluids. It certainly didn’t help that her breathing came out snuffly and loud, earning her several glances, so she finally sucked up her fears and asked to go to the bathroom. The teacher allowed it, she walked to the mercilessly empty restroom, went into a stall, and blew her nose. By the time she had flushed the toilet paper down the drain, she realized she now had to go to the bathroom, but someone else had entered by then. She was just going to leave and let her bladder suffer like she usually did, but apparently her body just <em> knew </em> she was in a restroom and threatened to murder her kidneys if she didn’t just pee like a normal person. It was like when your mouth would water when you simply <em> breathed </em> in the direction of a singular Sour Patch Kid- <em> it knew. </em></p><p>However, she had already flushed the toilet. What if the other girl in there with her thought she was playing some weird bathroom hijinks? What if she found out who she was and told the whole school about her being some kind of creep? </p><p>Held against her will by the impending doom of having a potentially excruciatingly painful UTI, Winnie came up with a foolproof plan: She walked out of the stall like normal, washed her hands, then went to the door. As she opened the door, she said, “Oh, excuse me,” as if she had bumped into someone else, closed it, then walked to the furthest possible stall, making sure to change her footfalls as she went, just to make sure the other girl wouldn’t recognize her by her shoes. </p><p>The plan ended up being successful! She still hated going to the bathroom in public, though. Especially now.</p><p>As hindering as her many anxieties were, she knew that they were a double-edged sword. Sure, she still didn’t know how to drive, but a least she wouldn’t get into any wrecks that would be her fault. Yeah, she had a hard time crossing the street, but she wouldn’t be hit if she waited until every car was gone. Yes, she couldn’t ask for anything from people, but she wasn’t annoying them. It all worked out in the end! The issues come with their own rewards! Nobody could protect her better than herself, she had learned that at a very young age. Her parents made sure to let her know how she wasn’t worth anyone’s care, so she took to being an overly-cautious nervous wreck to keep herself safe.</p><p>That being said, she was a fool for not trusting her own gut.</p><p>In a way, it wasn’t even her fault. She only went to the bathroom that day because she thought she had started her period, and every girl knew there was nothing worse than bleeding through your pants for everyone to see. <em> That </em>fear in particular overrode the fear of going to the bathroom in public, so, near the end of sixth period World History class, she raised her hand and asked to use the restroom.</p><p>Looking back on it, she wondered why the teacher even said yes, especially when class was so close to being over. Maybe it was because she was the best in the class and he liked her? Maybe it was because he feared her parents like every other school employee seemed to? Or maybe it was because he was in on it? She never took Mr. Sutherland, her funny, talkative World History teacher, to be malicious, but at the same time, she didn’t think people hated her enough to do what they did, either.</p><p>Whatever his reason was, Mr. Sutherland said yes and she walked out of the classroom with a pad tucked discreetly in her pocket. Tampons were another thing that gave her anxiety. She once tried to put one in and it hurt so bad she started crying, and she had never put one near her vagina ever since. Also just the thought of sticking something up there made her incredibly uncomfortable. What if it got stuck? What if the string broke? Would she have to pull it out with her own bare fingers or could she go to the hospital for something like that? No, no… She would never have the courage to explain that to some doctors. </p><p>Winnie wondered how long they--the assholes who did this to her--were waiting. Days? Weeks? Months? <em> Years? </em>How long had they been waiting to hurt her like they did? </p><p>She tried not to think about it. Tried not to think about how some people despised her existence so much that they had to do what they did. </p><p>She thought it was because of her family. A lot of students had a strong disdain for her because of the money they held. Whenever something bad happened in the world, they would always pester her, asking if she was going to donate, and when she said no, they called her cruel and heartless and other mean things she would rather not have to repeat. No matter how many times that she explained that she didn’t control the wealth, that she couldn’t just give her parents’s money away without getting in serious trouble, they never listened. They just kept calling her names, saying she was lucky to be financially stable, saying that they would kill to live a life like hers, saying that she shouldn’t care if she got in trouble as long as the donations were made to help others because apparently being righteously selfish was now fucking illegal in Edgewater, Indiana.</p><p>It made her so mad. Her anger was a deep, dark kind of thing, lurking beneath the anxiety and timidity and shyness. It was hidden, but it was there. And with ehr track record of standing up for herself, it was never going to come out.</p><p>She had tried to stand up for herself, though. A few times. Once was during one of the donation conversations, and she explained herself over and over and over again to no avail. Finally, she snapped and exclaimed that it wasn’t her fault that she was born into a rich family, that she barely was even considered apart of the family in the first place, and she was just <em> so sorry </em> the other kid’s mother had to work two jobs to put food on the table, but it <em> wasn’t her fault. </em></p><p>That winded up with her getting a black eye and busted lip. She had told everyone that she had run into the corner of her open microwave door, and nobody batted an eye at it, even though the story didn’t really explain why her lip was split down the middle. Because they didn’t <em> care </em>, and that was what hurt the worst, despite her injuries.</p><p>But being beat up was one of the main reasons Winnie backed off of sticking up for herself. She was better off giving no reaction and waiting for whoever was bothering her to just walk away.</p><p>Unfortunately, that passivity didn’t work in the bathroom.</p><p>Have you ever been punched in the kidney before? Winnie will tell you- it’s not fun. There was a reason why they were such a lethal place to stab or shoot in a weaponized fight.</p><p>The kidneys are full of nerve endings. Women who’ve had kidney stones and gone into labor say that the kidney stones were worse. Winnie had had one before thanks to her track record of holding in her pee for hours at a time and also never drinking water because she’s just a fucking idiot, and it put her on the ground, writhing in agony, crying like a little baby. It ended up being the size of a grain of sand, but she vividly remembered the way it scraped the track to her urethra completely raw, rendering her body completely useless unless she wanted to feel pain so bad she could barely breathe until she passed it.</p><p>That being said, when the fist came out of nowhere and slammed into her side, the first thing she dizzily thought was, <em> Ah, kidney pain, my old friend. </em></p><p>This was then immediately followed by, <em> WHAT THE FUCK?! </em></p><p>Being punched in the kidney is like being winded, but it’s not your lungs, it’s your whole body. In an instant, Winnie folded, crumpling to the ground in a twitching ball of agony. </p><p>She’d had the wind knocked out of her more than once during her lifetime, and she knew that in a few moments, she’d be fine again--or as fine as someone who’d just been socked in the hyper-sensitive kidney could possibly be--but this wasn’t exactly the kind of situation where she had moments to spare for breath-catching.</p><p>And on top of that, the human body had a tendency to freak out when it couldn’t breathe. Like, a lot.</p><p>She choked and spluttered, mouthing like a fish out of water as she tried to pull air into lungs that just weren’t ready to get back on their feet yet. Through the oxygen-deprived haze that was covering her vision, she saw four people in total around her- two boys and two girls. One of them was the one who had given her the black eye and busted lip, and things started to come together right about then.</p><p>The next words she heard were the thing that made her entire world come crashing down onto her.</p><p>  “Take off her clothes.”</p><p>  “No!” Winnie yelled, but she couldn’t speak. She could barely even breathe. She didn’t know if it was from the punch to the kidney or the fear of what was about to happen to her. She couldn’t think straight.</p><p>Rough hands began tugging at her overalls, and, for the briefest of moments, she felt a glimmer of hope because the two boys attempting to strip her were having trouble with getting the straps undone.</p><p>  “How the fuck do you get these fucking things off?” Snarled one, the one that had beat her up before. His brown hair was raggedy and oily- could his mom not pay for water bills so he could shower, either? </p><p>  “Who even still wears overalls?” Said the other. He was smaller than Scruffy on her other side, but had a look in his eyes that just said he harassed girls on the daily. “It’s 2021.”</p><p>Great. Now she was being stripped <em> and </em>getting made fun of for her fashion sense.</p><p>  “You two are fucking useless,” Hissed the blonde girl of the group. She shoved Wolf Whistle to the side and undid the clasps of Winnie’s overalls, yanking them down to her waist. “There. <em> God. </em>Can you handle the rest?”</p><p>  “Who shoved a porcupine up your cooch?” Wolf Whistle said, and Blondie glared at him so fiercely it was a wonder he didn’t burst into flames. “Sorry! Sorry. I was just saying.”</p><p>  “Will you hurry the hell up?” The other girl, a brunette with a mop of curly hair like a Raggedy Ann doll, said. She looked down at her phone. “We got five minutes.”</p><p>Well. The brightside was she was only going to be raped for five minutes. Worse than no minutes, but better than anything longer. Maybe if she could stall long enough, they wouldn’t get to do anything.</p><p>Winnie began to squirm as best as she could while being restrained and still dealing with the pain of a punch to the kidney. She managed to get one of her legs free and kicked Scruffy in the jaw, making him wobble backwards while he was trying to get the bottoms of the overalls off. Wolf Whistle instantly burst into laughter.</p><p>  “Damn, this girl’s got BALLS!” He howled.</p><p>  “Shh!!” Blondie hissed again. “Do you WANT us to get caught?”</p><p>  “Sorry! It’s just funny!”</p><p>Behind them, Scruffy sat back up, looking more like some kind of hulking mountain rising from the ground than a human being.</p><p>A terrible, rumbling growl that would be more befitting of a wild animal came erupting out of Scruffy’s throat, and whatever part of Winnie’s panicked brain was spitting out all these nonsensical comparisons quickly replaced ‘mountain’ with ‘volcano’. A moment later, something that had the solidity and strength of a small boulder came smashing upwards into her lower jaw with a sickening <em> crunch. </em></p><p>Blood filled Winnie’s mouth.</p><p>For a brief moment, she thought she had blacked out. Maybe she had. But then her eyes, watery and blurry and rolling around in their sockets, peeled back open and revealed that she was still in the bathroom, still being stripped, and it wasn’t a nightmare like she had been praying.</p><p>If she hadn’t already had several reasons to not believe in God, she certainly did now. </p><p>  “Dude!” Raggedy Ann yelped. “Don’t fucking kill her!”</p><p>  “She kicked me!” Scruffy griped back.</p><p>  “That doesn’t mean you sucker punch her in the damn jaw!”</p><p>  “We are stripping this girl and THAT’S the thing you zero in on?”<br/>  “If you hit her hard enough to kill her, then we’re all dead!”</p><p>  “I wasn’t gonna fucking kill her!”</p><p>  “WILL YOU TWO <em> SHUT UP? </em>” Blondie whisper-yelled. “Seriously! Shut up and hurry up ‘cause we don’t got a lot of time left!”</p><p>Grumbling, Scruffy began helping Wolf Whistle take off Winnie’s clothes again. Upon the removal of her overalls, a child hit Winnie’s bare legs and she shivered. Tears began to fall from her eyes.</p><p>  “Please stop,” She begged.</p><p>They all ignored her.</p><p>  “Time to see if the curtains match the drapes,” Wolf Whistle smirked sadistically.</p><p>  “Isn’t it ‘curtains match the carpet’?” Raggedy Ann said.</p><p>  “Yeah, because curtains and drapes are the same thing,” Scruffy nodded.</p><p>  “Who CARES?” Blondie exclaimed. “Just hurry up!”</p><p>Wolf Whistle removed Winnie’s underwear and declared, “They do!”</p><p>Winnie screwed her eyes shut and sobbed. She kept telling herself that it wasn’t real, that this wasn’t happening, that it was all okay, but nothing changed every single time she peeked out from behind her eyelids, and that made her cry even harder. </p><p>  “Please stop,” She pleaded. “Please, please stop… I’ll do anything! J-just don’t--” She sobbed.</p><p>  “You had your chance, bitch,” Scruffy spat.</p><p>Winnie was freezing cold. School bathrooms were always the equivalent of Antarctica, but it was even worse when you were completely naked. She was starting to shiver--or maybe she was just trembling in pure terror.</p><p>Hands hooked underneath her armpits and hauled her to her feet. She nearly collapsed all over again, but Wolf Whistle held her up.</p><p>  “Wh-what are you gonna do to me?” She squeaked, huddling her arms close to her chest.</p><p>Wolf Whistle smiled toothily at her. “Aren’t you eager?”</p><p>  “It’s 3:27,” Blondie said, looking down at her phone. “Go! Go! Hurry!”</p><p>Scruffy yanked open the bathroom door and Wolf Whistle manhandled her out into the hallway. Winnie tried her best to fight him, but she was still reeling from what had just happened. </p><p>The arms around her then let go, and she saw the four kids sprint off down the hallway. Winnie opened her mouth to call after them, twitched her leg to run back into the bathroom, but then the bell rang and everything suddenly made sense.</p><p>Winnie wondered if this was how Carrie White felt when she got rancid pig’s blood poured on her. So much noise, and then silence in the blink of an eye. Everyone staring at her. Dozens of reactions she got to watch- shock, amusement, disgust, pity, bewilderment, confusion. But at least Carrie was clothed when the prank happened. At least she got the sanctity and safety of her Prom dress. Winnie got nothing.</p><p>She would have much preferred the rancid pig blood.</p><p>Winnie was soon dimly aware that she wasn’t crying, though she supposed that was what shock did to you. All she could do was stand there like a deer in the headlights of an oncoming eighteen-wheeler, waiting to be run over, and that was it. She couldn’t move, couldn’t call for help, couldn’t produce tears, could barely breathe- hell, she couldn’t even turn her head to see the reactions of the dozens of other people behind her, and she didn’t know which view of her naked body she was more humiliated by.</p><p>In the crowd, she spotted Emma and Alyssa, and she looked at them with a desperate gaze, silently pleading for them to come help her, but Emma turned her head away and Alyssa didn’t move. <em> That </em>was the thing that made a tear run down her cheek.</p><p>For a brief moment, the anger was back. She was angry that her friends didn’t come save her, angry that they were as useless as she was, angry that she couldn’t even help herself. She needed them more than ever, and they refused to come. </p><p>In a way, she could understand their reasoning. The two lesbians going to help the naked girl? The school, while better than before, was still adjusting to having LGBT kids out and proud. Surely some people would find the gays in particular going to help rather weird, but she didn’t <em> care </em>. And they shouldn’t care, either, because she was their friend and they were supposed to help her and be there for her, no matter what. If Emma was in her spot, Alyssa would come to her rescue in an instant, and vice versa, so what made Winnie so horrible that they turned her back on her when she really, truly needed them?</p><p>Anxiety.</p><p>It all came down to the same thing, didn’t it? Fear. It truly was a fickle thing.</p><p>For the longest time, Winnie had thought nothing could scare Alyssa and Emma. They were like her superheroes- nothing could rattle them. They always seemed so strong, so sure of themselves, but now she knew they were nothing but selfish, back-stabbing, heartless <em> cowards </em>who never gave a shit about her.</p><p>There was a touch on her shoulder; Winnie flinched. She looked up and saw Dee Dee Allen standing there, and she would have laughed at how absurd this all was if she hadn’t felt so empty. First, she got stripped naked, then she got pushed out into the hallway during passing period, and now Dee Dee-fucking-Allen was the one to escort her bare ass self away from the situation? She had to be having some kind of awful fever dream. Her body certainly felt hot enough to warrant such a belief.</p><p>Well. She was lucky for the fling between Dee Dee and Principal Hawkins, at least. Her friends made it clear that they could care less if people took pictures and videos of her when she was like this. </p><p>Winnie whimpered. Principal Hawkins was in for a shock.</p><hr/><p>Winnie was out of school for four days, and in that time, she barely left her room. She stayed huddled underneath her blankets, sobbing until it hurt to breathe or until her eyes couldn’t produce anymore tears. </p><p>It was such a visceral feeling- the humiliation. Every morning, <em> every single morning </em>, she would wake up and it would hit her and she would start crying all over again. It was like when her cat died when she was thirteen- sleep let her forget, but it all came rushing back the moment her eyes opened again--but this time it was even worse. A dead pet was one thing, but being stripped naked for the whole school to see…</p><p>How was she supposed to recover from that?</p><p>She wanted to disappear. She wanted to curl up into a ball and fade away forever. She wanted to get those fucking photos of her off of social media. She wanted to <em> die </em>.</p><p>Winnie Thompson, the girl who died of embarrassment. Wouldn’t her parents enjoy that?</p><p>There were whispers outside her door, there always were since she came home early that day with ehr disgruntled parents, and she tried not to listen, she tried, she tried. She didn’t want to hear the scorn, the disgust, the amusement, not this time. She couldn’t take it right now.</p><p>She curled up tighter until her muscles burned, and she was happy for it. She wanted her body to hurt. She dug her nails into her soft belly and pictured ripping off chunks of her own flesh until she was nothing but shredded flesh and muscle, until she was gone completely. Until she was what her parents wanted and loved- what her <em> friends </em>wanted and loved.</p><p><em> God. </em>If she didn’t already feel awful, then the texts she was getting from her friend group certainly made sure of that. Usually, she would be honored that they even texted her, but after what happened…</p><p>Kaylee and Shelby had been in the hallway, too, apparently. They were behind her, so now she got to live with the fact that they had seen her bare ass cheeks and would now remember it every time she simply looked at them. Kevin and Nick, thank god, had not been in the hallway. But she would have much preferred them to have seen her than the people she actually wanted attention and affection from.</p><p>Alyssa texted her on the daily, asking if she was alright, checking in on her. Emma also talked to her quite often, trying to distract her with random conversations. Kaylee and Shelby told her about how they were working on getting the photos and videos down, and though she appreciated it, she could have lived without the knowledge that people had, in fact, filmed her when she was like that. She and Kevin wordlessly played golf and pool on Game Pigeon because he recognized that she didn’t want to talk, but still lent his presence the best way he could. Even Nick sent her a text saying what happened was fucked up. And despite all of this comfort and support, one thing kept running through her mind every time she received a text from them:</p><p>Why did they only care <em> now </em>, after something terrible had happened?</p><hr/><p>  “Let me drive you home.”</p><p>Winnie looked up at Emma, at her painfully sincere expression, through tired eyes.</p><p>  “What?”</p><p>Her first day back at school had been terribly exhausting. Everyone seemed to be staring at her. She couldn’t escape the eyes no matter where she went- they were always there, following her, drilling straight through her clothes. Even now that she was dressed, she still felt bare and vulnerable.</p><p>  “Let me drive you home,” Emma repeated. Alyssa, Shelby, and Kaylee hovered behind her silently, all wearing matching expressions of concern. “Please.”</p><p>  “Why?”</p><p>Emma blinked. “Because it’s safer for you. After what happened--” She was fumbling, and it made Winnie’s blood boil in her veins. “You know how straight guys are. How people are in general.”</p><p>Why was she acting so fucking awkward and sheepish? She had nothing to be embarrassed about. Was it because she had seen her naked? She shouldn’t even be thinking about that when looking at Winnie. That shouldn’t be the first thing she saw when in her presence.</p><p>  “And I care about you. You’re my friend.”</p><p>  “Didn’t seem that way a few days ago,” Winnie muttered.</p><p>Emma’s eyebrows twitched together. “What?”</p><p>Winnie raised her head fully, stretching out her sore neck from looking at the ground all day, met Emma’s eyes, and said, “If this is your way of saying sorry, then you’re doing a really bad job.”</p><p>Winnie wasn’t quite sure where this fire was coming from, but she didn’t mind it. This wasn’t like the burning sensation she got from standing in that hallway- this made her feel <em> powerful </em>. </p><p>  “What are you talking about?” Emma said. Behind her, Alyssa, Shelby, and Kaylee looked as confused as she sounded. “Sorry for what?”</p><p>  “You know what,” Winnie said.</p><p>  “Uhh, no, I don’t.”</p><p>  “Winnie, honey, you have to talk to us,” Alyssa stepped in. Her voice was gentle and warm, speaking to Winnie as if she thought she would shatter into millions of pieces if she talked too loudly, and Winnie certainly felt like shattering. She felt like she was made of hollow glass.</p><p>Glass, of course, was razor sharp.</p><p>  “You didn’t seem too interested in me talking to you before this happened,” Winnie said. “Was me being publicly humiliated really the boost you needed to remember I exist?”</p><p>Their confusion doubled tenfold and it made Winnie unfathomably angry. How did they not know?</p><p>  “I don’t understand…” Alyssa said.</p><p>  “Of course you don’t,” Winnie said bitterly. “But hey!” She threw her arms up with a rueful smile. “At least you get to put on your college resume that you have let down two people by not going to them when they needed you the most!”</p><p>Shelby’s jaw dropped. Kaylee slapped a hand over her mouth. Alyssa looked extremely hurt, and it almost, <em> almost </em>, made Winnie back down, but then she remembered her own pain and knew that sometimes it was okay to be selfish, especially after being left by people you trusted to be gawked at while completely naked.</p><p>And then, there was Emma, who had a burning look in her eyes. Winnie had to admit that she was rather scary when pissed off, but she didn’t really care at that moment. She was pissed off, too.</p><p>  “What the fuck is your problem?” Emma growled, slotting herself in front of Alyssa protectively.</p><p>  “What the fuck is YOUR problem?” Winnie fired back at her. “I thought I was your friend!”</p><p>  “You’re the one insulting us!”</p><p>  “And you’re the ones who left me in that hallway naked for everyone to see!”</p><p>There was a moment of silence that was so thick you could probably cut it with a knife. Then, Emma’s eyebrows gathered together like storm clouds.</p><p>  “<em> That’s </em>what this is about?” Emma said, and Winnie stared at her in disbelief.</p><p>  “<em> Yes! </em> ” Winnie said, exasperated. “What did you <em> think </em> this was about? Fucking <em> lunch </em>?”</p><p>She didn’t think she had ever cussed this much in her whole life. </p><p>  “We didn’t leave you, Winnie!” Emma said as if Winnie hadn’t been there, living through the petrifying experience that she had yet to recover from.</p><p>  “But you didn’t do anything, <em> Emma! </em>” Winnie struck back at her. “You just stood there and let it happen! You even looked away from me!”</p><p>  “I’m sorry, but I didn’t want to see a fifteen-year-old's naked body!”</p><p>  “Oh, so now I’m just a ‘fifteen-year-old’ to you?” Winnie glared at her.</p><p>  “That’s not what I meant and you know it,” Emma said.</p><p>  “And yet, you still said it,” Winnie said. “Are you-- are you <em> embarrassed </em>by me? Are you ashamed of being seen around me now?”</p><p>  “No--”</p><p>  “Is that why you’re treating a ride home like it’s fucking charity work?” Winnie talked over her. “Like you’re doing some good cause for the ‘fifteen-year-old’ who got publicly humiliated and mentally scarred in front of the whole school? That’s where this bullshit change of heart came from.”<br/>  “No!” Emma yelled. “This isn’t a pity thing, Winnie! How do you think the rest of us felt? Not everything is about <em> you. </em>”</p><p>  “Not everything is about--” Winnie actually gave a shocked laugh. She ran a hand through her hair. Then, she nodded. “Okay.” She slipped her messenger bag off and sat down on the ground with it in her lap. She smiled up at Emma. “Tell me about it.”</p><p>Emma was taken aback. “What?” Behind her, Kaylee and Shelby exchanged looks.</p><p>  “Tell me about it, Emma,” Winnie said. “Tell me how <em> awful </em>it was for you to have to look at my disgusting, naked, fifteen-year-old body.”</p><p>Emma faltered, looked from Alyssa, to Shelby, to Kaylee, then said, “It was--” </p><p>Winnie nodded her head eagerly at her.</p><p>  “It was…scary…and worrying…”</p><p>  “Wow,” Winnie said. “That must have been horrible to go through. What else?”</p><p>Guilt overtook Emma’s anger. Winnie wanted her and everyone else to feel in their <em> bones </em>what they had done to her.</p><p>  “And it was--just awful,” Emma looked away. “I’m sorry, Winnie.”</p><p>Winnie nodded with a blank expression as tears ran down her cheeks. “I <em> needed </em> you. I needed <em> all of you. </em> But you didn’t come and I felt <em> horrible </em> . I was <em> so scared. </em>”</p><p>  “I bet,” Emma whispered.</p><p>Winnie stood up and slung her messenger bag back around her shoulders. She sniffled. “Thank you for the offer, but I’m gonna take the walk.” Then, softer, “Bye.”</p><p>She turned and began walking out of the parking lot--</p><p>--only to have her wrist grabbed after taking a few steps.</p><p>She looked back through tears at Emma, who bundled her into her arms, and <em> that </em>was what made Winnie break down completely. She clung to Emma with all her might, sobbing.</p><p>  “I was so scared, Emma,” Winnie wept. “They-- the kids, they--” She cut herself off with a wet whimper and smothered her face against Emma’s chest.</p><p>  “Shh, shh,” Emma stroked through her hair. “It’s okay. It’s okay, now. I’m here.”</p><p>She was there.</p><p>However long that lasted, Winnie was going to relish it.</p><p>For now, it would be okay.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>for the record: i'm not trying to antagonize Emma or Alyssa. i just felt like their reactions were very natural in that situation. also Drama</p></blockquote></div></div>
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